Yesterday Today Tomorrow
by Malaia
Summary: Ser Perth is sent on a mission by the Arl to capture an apostate in the Kocari Wilds. It's rated M for some mildly sexual content and a little blood and gore. PS: I'm a romance-aholic- you been warned! Thanks in advance for reading and reviewing *wink*
1. Chapter 1

Twenty Years Ago

The babe was pure joy and magic. Literally magic, Mirina thought, horrified. Her finger was encased in Wilhelmina's tiny hand and she wept silently, worried it was the last time she'd feel her daughter's touch. The Circle would come for her sweet girl and her babe would be lost to her forever.

The Circle left no child with magic loose and free. For both the child and the world were in danger of an uncontrolled mage. People were superstitious and cruel, quick to place blame on innocents for any wrongdoing. A simple nest of crows could bring about pitchforks and screaming mobs to any door thought to house a mage. And there wasn't much suspicion about Wilhelmina.

At three months old the babe had started a snow storm in her bedroom. Although no villagers had seen the act, it was difficult to hide snow being shoveled outdoors in the bloom of summer.

A month later flowers began blooming in the strangest places. A simple milkweed had sprouted from the nanny's head, a garland of flowers had graced the cat's neck, causing it to panic and screech around the room.

Nobility or no, mages were sent off to the tower, forever. They were taught control and stability, but they were watched and leashed like farm animals. They were used for healing, but never appreciated for their deeds. Mirina couldn't fathom losing her daughter to such a place.

She understood the dangers of magic, yet she couldn't reconcile losing her babe. She made her decision.

Scooping up Wilhelmina she stole into the night and disappeared.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - Nineteen Years Ago

Mirina was terrified of the witch. The witch was certainly was out of her mind, but her daughter was all that mattered.

It was her fault her daughter lay near death inside the hut. She closed her eyes tight and dug her nails into her palms. After hundreds of towns, and miles of travel she'd heard of the Kocari Wilds and witches that lived freely. She'd brought them to this accursed forest with darkspawn lurking behind every tree.

Cursing herself, again, Mirina wrung her hands near the warmth of the fire. The two wilder witches were in the hut trying to repair damage from a darkspawn arrow which had entered into her little girl's eye. She'd been sure her Wilhelmina dead, but the babe cried. It had taken hours and so much running her feet were blistered, and her legs were bloody from the bushes. Although she'd been looking, she'd been found, instead, by Morrigan, breathless and sobbing by a tree. Morrigan couldn't have been more than ten, yet she had the soul of a woman.

She stood outside Morrigan and Flemeth's small hut waiting for news, hearing her daughter's screaming. Every cry brought her to new heights of terror until Flemeth came out of the hut.

"The child will live, but I cannot say what the arrow has done to her magic. Perhaps eradicated it from her, for I cannot sense it."

Mirina nearly knocked over Flemeth trying to get inside the hut. Flemeth grabbed her arm tightly.

"There is one other thing."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 - Today

His sword arced in a perfect angle, whistling through the air, striking across on the Hurlock's neck. Its head went backwards dangling for a moment and then rolled onto the grass.

His sword wasn't a weapon, it wasn't an accessory; it was an extension of himself. It thrummed and hissed as he swung it forward driving into flesh and bone. It sang, melodically, when it sliced through armor. Those were the only sounds he heard in battle.

He turned as the Hurlock fell and presented his back to the next, tucking in his head and driving his sword under his arm, into its belly. He yanked out the sword, turned again, flipped it and threw it, straight and steady, into the heart of the last standing darkspawn archer.

He stood breathing heavily as the sounds and sights of the forest slowly came back into focus. One of his men lay bleeding on the ground and he motioned for another to tend to the wounds. He looked around to see that he had only the one casualty. The other nine men stood armed and ready, eyes darting right and left.

He looked over the grounds and took in the results of the battle. They'd been ambushed, minutes ago, by twenty darkspawn led by an Emissary. The Emissary had been the first to perish, by his sword. He noted it lying in two parts with a satisfying grunt. One of his men was finishing off survivors with a blank expression.

He went over and pulled his sword out of the archer while he noted their position. His men stood behind him, but he took greater comfort in the sword that hung at his back. Not that his men were substandard, they weren't, however, he knew, beyond any doubt, his sword was the Maker's hand.

"Come on then, we'll have to make camp elsewhere or the stench of the dead will put us right off our cups." His men chuckled, nervously.

He set up four guards in shifts, with him on the first shift. The campfire may draw attention to their position, but he could see in the night several fires burning. 'Were they darkspawn, or Chasind?' he wondered idly. One was just as dangerous as the other. He settled into a crouch.

****

Four weeks he'd been on the trail, hunting for a specific apostate. 'A healer with unimaginable powers', was all he was told. Supposedly it was completely immune to the demons of the Fade; the most dangerous place for mages; though they could be consumed by evil in the waking world as well as the dream one.

"I'm a knight, not a Templar," he'd argued with the Arl, but the Arl was adamant. A Templar was duty bound to kill apostate mages, or at the very least bring them back to the Circle.

"This mage has sent too many Templars back to the Circle with empty hands or broken limbs. They say it can shape shift and is immune to their spells. Regardless, I need it alive. Connor needs it alive."

It didn't make him feel better that everyone referred to the mage as "it". He had no idea what to look for, let alone who or where.

Connor was already at the Circle, and last he'd heard had been doing quite well there. But the Arl was, well the Arl, and who was he to question?

"Templars come and Templars go"

Perthius stood up abruptly and turned in circles only to find no one there. He'd heard her voice, at least the thought it was a "her", soft though it was, almost like singing.

"Show yourself", he demanded, drawing his sword. Rustling behind him made him turn, but he still saw nothing.

"Come out, come out wherever you are", she said, eerily in a singsong voice. And then she laughed, which sounded like the tinkling of bells, but still sent a shiver straight up his spine.

She was everywhere and nowhere. Her voice sounded like it came from every side, he couldn't pinpoint where she was standing. Maker, what was she, or it. He turned to his men who slept soundly. "Wake up!" he hissed.

Another giggle greeted him and the hairs on his arms stood straight up, brushing against his armor. "Sleep the dark ones come to bite, sleep the day and sleep the night. Sleeping men, forever keep, waking naught from Mina's weep. Send a tear into a cup, and Templar's men never wake up."

His heart pounded in his chest. She seemed to be going in large circles around the camp as he followed her voice. He was terrified his men were dead. If she killed ten men without him even knowing, he might as well pray to the Maker now for his soul.

Out of nowhere he felt a gust of wind and then he was on the ground. In a moment's breath she was on him, straddling his hips. He'd never seen anything like her. Fire and ice, was all he could think of. Hair the color of ice, but eyes as red as fire, she looked down at him. Maker, he couldn't move his arms or legs. She had him at her mercy.

He'd faced hundred of darkspawn during the blight but nothing terrified him more than this moment.

"Templars come and Templars go, Mina makes them pay you know", she smiled and ran her finger over his bottom lip. He realized something odd about her, she seemed to be looking at him, but not _looking_ at him. And then suddenly he could move. He threw her off him and scrambled to get his sword.

She crawled backwards to a tree and pushed herself up against it, smiling all the while. He walked cautiously over to his men, holding his sword towards her, and her head followed him. Her eyes, however, didn't and that's when he knew what was so odd. "You're blind?"

"Mina sees what Mina needs. She smells fear and hears fear's beat."

She was beautiful and terrifying and quite mad, he decided. She hadn't moved from the tree, but followed him, head cocked, as he checked the pulse on each man. Relieved to find pulses on every one, he looked at her curiously. "Does Mina lie?" he asked curiously.

"Mina kills when Mina wishes. Shall she kill to prove herself?" Her head tilted the opposite way and she stepped forward.

"Ah so you don't always speak in rhyme, then" he noted. "No, I suppose you could have killed us all while we slept, you've nothing to prove to me". His men were slowly waking up around him and a few looked alarmed at his words.

She stepped closer and waved a hand at their fire. It blazed upwards lighting the whole camp. Most of the men stood with weapons drawn, but none would attack unless told. They all knew not to kill any mage until they found the one they needed, or were unable to control him or her.

The light illuminated more than his men, it gave him a full picture of her. She took his breath away, literally.

Her skin was translucent, silver and yet blue, and somehow it glittered. She wore a skirt, which ended much higher than any skirt he'd ever seen. In fact, it barely covered her hips, at which she had two daggers strapped with a leather band. Her top was, Maker, he blinked but it didn't change what he saw. Her top wasn't there. Well that wasn't entirely true, she had a small bunch of flowers that decorated her chest, but otherwise, he could see every luscious bit of her.

His men were noticing too.

She cocked her head and sniffed. She looked at him curiously and stepped closer. He motioned with the back of his hand for his men to stand down. She kept moving closer to him, sniffing.

"Why do the Templars smell so" she demanded, not a hairs breath away from him. "Fear, but not fear. Hearts beating as sparrows?" Her face turned to him as she waited for answers, but he had no idea what she was talking about. Though he understood "smelling fear", he'd done so himself, before, he had no clue what other "smell" she imagined at the moment.

And then her hands touched his face. She traced every inch with the soft pads of her fingers. He stood there unable to move and breathed in deeply, inhaling her scent. She smelled…like the forest, wild and woody and he breathed in deeper. And then he realized _she_ was smelling _him, _very intimately_._

Her nose was in his neck and then along his jawbone and then she stood on her tip toes and did the most astounding thing. She kissed him dead on the mouth. He heard his men chuckle, uncomfortably, behind him. It took a great deal of will power and strength to push her away, but he managed.

By Maker, she was pouting. She must eighteen or twenty, but she seemed to act like a child. Perhaps he misjudged her age.

"Do not do that again."

"Oh. Okay", she said looking very confused. "Does it feel bad for you? It felt very nice for Mina"

"It's nothing to do with how it feels. You don't touch people without permission", he said exasperated. She was beautiful, but so odd; speaking of herself in the third person, wearing nothing but a leather skirt and strap, speaking in rhyme, kissing people for no reason. Had she been raised by wolves? And then chastised himself for being cruel. She probably _had_ been raised by wolves. She was most definitely wild.

And then she was gone.

He turned around to his men and they were turning around as well, looking for her. She had vanished while they stood there looking right at her.

"Be on your guard!" He shouted, needlessly, for no one slept a wink that night.


	4. Chapter 4

Mina listened to the Templars trudge through the muck and grass, twitching at every sound and touching sword hilts at every bird's cry.

Today she was the sparrow on the wing, flying high above them. Her wings felt free and light and she sometimes forgot about _them_ and soared into the sky and sun. The sun was warm and bright and it was a welcome difference from the black of night.

As a bird, and as wolf, she could see shapes and colors. In human form she could see nothing but forms and outlines. The world was mostly grey with people that moved like shadow puppets. The world was beautiful, however, lit up in her eyes by smell and sound. And the Templars came to take it from her.

She knew of Templars from both Morrigan and Flemeth, and some from her mother. But she remembered little of her mother, gone to the darkspawn before she was five. Morrigan and Flemeth looked out for her, though she was left alone for weeks and sometimes months. They told her of the Templars and she watched many die to their hands. And then Morrigan left and Flemeth disappeared and she didn't have to please Morrigan or Flemeth or anyone anymore.

So the Templars came and she trapped them in webs and whispered to them while they slept. She sang out at their campfires and poisoned their cups with sleeping potions. And sooner or later they left, injured or terrified, or both and she waited for the next camp of _them_.

But this one didn't wear _them's_ armor. This one didn't smell like _them. _This one smelt like the water at the base of the mountain, and the sparks that sometimes zapped from her fingers, and oh how she wanted to smell him again and again. And taste him as last night, for he tasted of salt and something else she'd never tasted before, which was sweet and heavenly and now she wondered if they all tasted like that and did they all not allow touching. And it didn't matter so much that they were _them_ and she was she, because she really wanted that feeling that started in the pit of her tummy last night. With that decided she glided to the branch above them jumped down behind the last one in the line.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5 - The Crazy Witch

Sweet Maker was she kissing Daniels? She was kissing Daniels and he was standing there with his eyes opened, looking stunned, but doing nothing to stop her either.

He stalked towards her only to witness her grabbing another one of his men, also stunned into inaction, and kissing him as well.

Maker, it seemed she was going to try and kiss them all, and then he wondered if something was on her lips which she was using as poison, but they all seemed fine and by the time he got to her, she just stood there looking confused with his men staring at her like she had two heads; except for Mathews who seemed to push aside the two men behind him in line.

She looked at him then, or rather turned her gaze to him, and cocked her head. He was getting used to that look, however disarming it was, and shook his head in bewilderment.

"They don't taste as you" She stated, pointing at him. "So I shall ask to taste you again."

She shall ask to…what?

"You don't ask to taste men" he said breathing out, frustrated. His mind boggled that she didn't understand how improper her actions were.

"But you said…"

"Yes, I know very well what I said, but that's not the only reason you don't touch people like that. Not the least of which that you have no clothes on"

"But I have clothes on" and she pointed to her floral patterned bosom.

"Not enough clothes" And he really wanted to raise his eyes to her face, but all his focus on was the flowers surrounding her bosom that trailed down her stomach to…He shook his head and forced himself to meet her face.

"You can't go around kissing everyone you please!" He was exasperated now.

"Kissing?" she asked bewildered.

"Kissing…putting your mouth against someone else's mouth, or body" She didn't know what kissing was? Was she so wild she had no experience at all?

"Do you live alone out here?" He asked because he couldn't ask what he really wanted to know which was; 'didn't your mother ever teach you not to entice men?' Because he was painfully aware that she must have no mother to teach her things like that.

"Yes, mother is sleeping in the Fade, protecting us from the Black City." The way she said it was so matter of fact it took him a moment to realize what she meant.

"I'm sorry", he murmured.

Again her head cocked to the side and her brows knit together. "Why? Did you send the darkspawn here?"

"No…I…meant sorry for you."

She raised her knitted brows and shook her head. "I've heard Templars are crazy from Lyrium"

"Yes, I've heard that too" he murmured wondering why he couldn't take his eyes off her lips and how she got such white teeth. "What?"

"Do they go around being sorry for everyone?"

"I don't know"

"It's just you then?"

"Er…I'm not a Templar" and she smiled and he forgot everything he was doing and supposed to do and just stood there, mouth open.

"Your mouth is open. Do you wish to taste Mina?" She looked at him hopefully.

He closed his mouth abruptly and while he shook his head 'no' what he said was "yes, please".

Looking very pleased she came in close and he wasn't sure where he got the strength but he put a hand on her chest and held her back. "I mean no!" he nearly shouted and she opened her eyes and looked so hurt he almost acquiesced. What could one kiss hurt, after all?

Andraste's blood she was a witch of the wilds, complete with bewitching spells.

"No I do not wish to taste… I mean kiss you", He lied. "One does not kiss strange men whom they do not know. One doesn't wear a top of flowers covering everything but the important bits when one has…when one _is_", he corrected, "a woman." And one certainly does not grab others, men especially, and kiss them without their permission."

"They did not object as you. Mina thinks she will do as she wishes." she said crossing her arms; which only served to lift her breasts up and cause him and every other man there to look directly at them. He sighed, closed his eyes and ran his hands through his hair.

He'd have to ignore her attire for now, he had more important tasks to worry about than an apostate, but perhaps she knew the mage they sought.

He was about to ask her when an arrow sang through the air and pierced Mathews through the leg. He crumpled to the ground.

"Darkspawn ahead" came a shout from the rear. And he turned to see a horde of fifteen darkspawn bearing down on them. He grabbed his sword, all the while working out how to flank them, but they were coming fast.

"Archers at the front, take down as many as you can before they get here. Patri, come here and see to Mathews…" He turned to see Mina's hands turning bright blue on Mathew's thigh and just like that the arrow passed through his thigh and he stopped moaning in pain. Mathews stared at her like she was Andraste herself as he stood up and unsheathed his daggers.

He was staring too and then she disappeared right before his eyes. Wait, not disappeared, he could see her now, barely. Her skin had changed. It was the color and texture of bark and grass, and then she rippled, and changed again, blending into her surroundings as she crept toward the darkspawn. She was impossibly fast and quiet and he watched as she walked behind one darkspawn and slit its throat.

She disappeared again and appeared behind another, at its feet. The thing twisted and fell and she drove two daggers into the side of its head. Again and again she disappeared and reappeared, felling one after another. His archers had taken down two, and she'd taken down three times that many in the same time. And as she drove in her blades, he realized in horror and awe, she was laughing, that merry twinkling sound of bells.

The remaining darkspawn turned round and round in circles frantically looking for her and finally tearing off into the forest. A knife flew out of thin air at one and he was down, and then another. And then she changed again her body arching into black fur and muscle. She was a wolf as black as night, and he saw her push off her back legs and leap, landing on a retreating Hurlock. The wolf's head whipped at the Hurlock's and he knew its throat was being torn out.

His men stood with their swords still drawn, staring at the scene before them. Not one moved or spoke. She had just taken down an entire darkspawn squad by herself, without a single scratch to herself as far as he could tell.

And then he knew who and what the Arl had sent him to bring back.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6 – Night of the Witch

Mina sat, once again, in the tree above _them_. She felt very pleased that they spoke of her quietly amongst themselves. Something in their camp smelled like the juice of the white flowers in the forest. She often sat sucking their sticky, sweet nectar. The smell seemed strongest on the one who was wounded earlier. He sat by himself across the camp, eating something she was sure had the flowers baked inside it.

Quietly she crawled over to him and listened to him eat. She showed herself before she too close. She took a deep, long sniff and closed her eyes, licking her lips.

He looked at her wild eyed and squeaked "Maker".

Half the camp stood up and came running to him.

"She means to eat me" he screamed and she looked around to see who wanted to eat him.

"Help me, Maker. I don't want to die" he sounded much like the darkspawn and Templars when they ran away, and she heard his heart, beating fast with fear.

"Do…do you eat each other?" she looked to the one that that refused her before, her eyes wide with amazement. They must, if he would think the same of her. She wrinkled her nose. He wasn't darkspawn, and those she never ate, only ripped out their throats and dug her claws into their chests. "Is that why you did not like the kissing?"

Mathews was set to wail like a babe getting the strap, two of his other men were just standing and gaping and at least two were trying to back up as far as possible.

Perthius had enough "Stop that noise before you bring the entire forest on our head!" he boomed at Mathews, "The rest of you get supper ready and set up the tents. And you," he turned to Mina "will stop talking about kissing and no, we do not eat each other." You'd think he brought new recruits instead of seasoned knights who'd fought beside him during the blight.

He was about to ask her about her magic when he looked to see her bent over and smelling the honey bread in Mathew's hand. Mathews was still as a deer.

"Oh for…"he grabbed the bread from Mathews and thrust it into her hand.

"Thank you!" She said, and directed it to Mathews instead of him.

"Now I have some qu…" She'd stuffed the entire piece of bread in her mouth.

"Iffs tasty" she said and spit little pieces out at him. Whether she covered her mouth to be dainty or hold the food in her mouth, he'll never know, but he hoped it was the former.

He closed his eyes and counted to ten in his head. When he opened them she was swallowing hard and running her tongue over each tooth. He was mesmerized by how completely un-feminine she was, yet at the same time completely feminine.

And then she disappeared again.

"Oh blast it!" He yelled to no one and everyone.

The flower bread was tasty, but Mina needed water. Just as she stepped outside the camp she heard him shout. She turned to see if they were under attack again, but he seemed to be standing still. Why does _them_ yell so much?

She would come back later for more of the bread and ask. For now she needed to feed Essie and Leki.


	7. Chapter 7

7. Chapter- 7 - The Cats, the Witch and the Tent

Perthius was dreaming about her scent. He couldn't understand why he smelled her while he was on the battlefield, alone. A thousand darkspawn and Redcliff soldiers lay dead or dying all around him and all he could smell was her. He opened his eyes to see her blinking back at him.

"What the…" he tried to sit up, managed to bump her forehead and was holding his hand against the growing bump, while scooting backwards.

"Mina came for more bread, but the Mathews hadn't any and pointed here." She was holding her forehead too, he noted with satisfaction. "Why do men in armor frighten so easily? One screams as a little girl from the village, saying Mina will eat him, while another just screams and hits Mina with his head."

He was sure she was a woman now; no man would come up with logic like that. "We do not frighten easily." He wanted to get up, but he would damn well not muck about in his skivvies with her two feet from him, whether she was blind or not. "We watched you kill nearly fifteen darkspawn by yourself today, something we've only managed to do when there were thousands to cut through. Then you then sneak into camp, steal bread, and for some reason stand over me while I sleep without one single hard, seasoned, knight noticing! Any sane person would be wary of you. Now get out of my tent so I can dress. It appears I'll not sleep tonight."

"Why can you not dress now? This is a large tent." By now he was not surprised that she had no decency and against his better judgment he got up to get dressed.

He'd just put one foot in his leather trousers when she spoke. "Mina likes your scent. Mina has chosen to mate with you." He fell over with one leg in and one out, gaping at her. "After you gets her more bread, that is." And she sat down and crossed her legs as if the mattered was settled.

He stalked out of his tent, muttering to himself and buckling his pants. "Chosen me! Like a pair of new boots" he exclaimed to no one in particular. "I've seen tavern wenches with more modesty, for Maker's sake." He grabbed some of the bread from the stores and stood outside the tent.

"Come out of there" he demanded.

"But does you not wish to mate inside the tent?" she said loudly as she poked her head out.

Two men chuckled at the far end of the camp. "Give 'er one for us Ser Perth" one shouted.

He felt the flush begin at his toes and was grateful it was dark. He had no idea what her response to a blush might be and he really didn't want to know.

Trying to control his anger he closed his eyes and began to count, once again, to ten. He was halfway to 100 when he opened one eye to find her looking up at him curiously. "I do not wish to mate inside the tent," and as she opened her mouth to speak, "nor outside the tent. Nor with you at all." Liar, someone in his head chastised. He pulled up her hand and deposited bread into it.

"Oh thank you!" She smiled again and he blinked. She knew "thank you" but didn't know not to ask to mate with strange men. Who was this woman?

"Mina..." She sat down directly and stuffed an enormous piece of the bread in her mouth and was having difficulty chewing with her cheeks so full.

"Mmmph" she looked up at him.

"Mina, who looks after you?"

"Ahh Awowon shep whore yeyi ah eheh"

"Chew, swallow then speak." he scolded. And she swallowed what must have been a fistful size lump of half chewed bread and began to cough. He lightly tapped her on the back and in turn she flicked a knife under his chin.

"Men aren't to hit girls!" she hissed.

"I didn't mean...yes, quite...that's what we do to make people stop coughing, Mina" He was well aware that he should be dead, now, and that he'd let his guard down. He grasped her wrist and pulled her knife away from his chin. "You're quite right, men shouldn't hit women, unless women are soldiers."

She nodded and sheathed the knife.

"Mina, you use magic, don't you?" He hadn't actually seen her cast any spells, other than shift her shape. She appeared to be magic with daggers, however, and insanely adept with camouflage.

"Mina has spells, but sometimes spells miss" She began to move her index finger in small circles pointing up at the sky, the finger began to glow white. He saw a small snowflake float in front of his eyes and looked up to see a cloud of snow above his head, which then dropped directly on his face.

He shook the snow from his eyes and hair and looked at her accusingly. She wasn't laughing, however, just appeared to be forlorn.

"Mina can't throw spells like Morrigan or Flemeth. Mina can only knit flesh and bone and blood and fur."

"Mina, you must stop talking about yourself in the third person, it's...well it's" It's what? It's endearing and annoying at the same time? It's charming and creepy? It's inappropriate and perfect? "You must say, "I" and "me"."

"Ser Perth," His first lieutenant approached him "I think we've found her hut, but well...she has some strange pets"

"Do not touch Leki or Essie!" She screamed and began to run out of camp. She jumped in the air and her body twisted into the wolf as she tore towards the northeast section of the forest.

Leki and Essie, or as she said "yeyi and eheh" turned out to be cats the size of small men and he wasn't sure what she meant about not touching them because quite honestly he didn't want to get within a thousand yards of them, let alone touch them. But he needed her and he wanted out of this damnable forest and there she was guarding two cats that didn't need guarding in any way shape or form.

One thing that he'd figured out as he tried not to stare at her naked chest, was why she dressed as she did. The shape shifting didn't allow for much clothing.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8 – Cats,

Mina knew the _them_ were afraid of Leki and Essie, but most ran away when they saw the cats. This one, which they called "Ser Perth", just stood at a distance. She smelled the _them's_ fear, the ones that stood behind him, but the one that smelled of clean water, he barely smelled of fear. And this made Mina very curious.

"Have you no cats in your house?"

"Yes, but our cats are…smaller"

"Mina's cats are bigger?" She was pleased. Bigger cats, bigger blades and no running and screaming like a little girl from the village.

"Mina's cats are bigger and Mina's blades are bigger. Mina doesn't run or hide from the darkspawn, Mina doesn't cry if they want to eat her. Mina kills every darkspawn and rips out the heart."

"Yes, quite."

"Mina has strange feelings when you speaks. Mina feels lots of ants here, crawling and squirming and making Mina have tummy flops" She pointed at her belly.

"Mina…you mustn't say such things" he seemed to be laughing. But she hadn't said anything funny. "Can you put the cats inside so I can come and talk to you?"

"Come, Leki and Essie will not hurt you. Mina thinks you musts not be afraid of things if you wear metal and carry big swords."

* * *

Her accent and word patterns were strange, part high class and part, well part he'd never heard before. He must get her to stop using the third person, it was driving him mad.

"Mina, why don't you use "I" or "me"?"

"Mina, look what you've done, selfish child, always thinking about yourself!" Her voice had changed and was dryer, older. "Me, me, me, I, I, I, that's all I ever hear from you. Now who will look after you? Do you think anyone wants a blind girl who can't mind herself?"

He looked at her with pity and anger at the same time. Who would say such things to a little girl?

"Mina went out to play. Mother said stay away. Mina went and Mina played and mother died to darkspawn blade." She chanted quietly, almost a whisper. When she began to chant the rhyme anew and Perthius put his hand over hers. He wanted to drive a sword into whoever left her alone out here.

Although her tale touched him, he had a duty. She was wild and unpredictable he had no idea how to approach the question he needed to ask. He wasn't sure how she would help in her current state of mind, anyway, but he had his orders.

"Mina, would you ever like to leave?"

"Leave?"

"The forest, go to a bigger place."

"Mina goes to the village sometimes to trade."

"I meant somewhere, bigger, like the Circle Tower?"

"You lies to Mina!" She shot out of her chair so fast he barely had time to get his sword out of his scabbard. Then that gust of wind again and he was staring up at the sky. She was on him in an instant, dagger raised above her head "Mina doesn't go with Templars" Maker she meant to drive it through his skull and the instant he thought that, she toppled over, an arrow pertruding from her hip.

He turned and watched as the two cats leapt after his men. "Don't kill them unless you have to! Stay your weapons." She'd never cooperate if her companions were dead. If she even lived, that is.

Two of his men were curled into balls, their armor taking the brunt of the cat's claws. He hated to risk his men, for animals no less, but she was the priority. He already had a problem if she was dead, if she lived and her pets died, they would have to kill her or she would kill them all. "Mathews, the Darkberry!" he called out.

An arrow flew through the air and hit one of the beasts in the leg. It roared and then fell off in a heap; a second arrow felled the other.

"Got 'em" Mathews said with a grin and nodded to the arrows. Darkberry was an herb known to both kill and cause sleep in certain doses. He was grateful Mathews knew the ins and outs of poisons.

"Well done Mathews. Remind me to speak with the Arl about this. I'll try and leave out the screaming from last night."

Mathews blushed and nodded.

"Now let's hope she breathes" he turned to where she lay, crumpled on her side near the hut.

She was breathing, but heavily.

"Patri" he called out.

* * *

She'd done nothing more than moan and sleep for the three days and nights they'd been on the road. Patri had patched her up as much as possible, but infection was more likely to seep into the wound, the longer they were on the road. And while Patri was capable using herbs, he was no healer. They needed a mage.

His men were tired and irritable, as was he. All this trouble and he was bringing back a half dead girl who couldn't cast magic properly and had the social graces of a feral dog.

"Ser Perth" Daniels had ridden up front "She's waking up"

Perthius turned his horse and galloped to the back where she lay on a cart.

She lifted her head and whispered, "Leki" and the cat howled in response followed by another howl, which he supposed was the other cat.

The cats, meanwhile, paced back and forth in makeshift cages directly behind her cart. Building carts and cages was usually quick and easy. However, building carts and cages while darkspawn could pounce at any moment, and before the cats awoke, was not easy. His men were on edge from the tasks and even with the beasts locked safely behind wooden prisons, his men eyed them cautiously. They weren't much less wary of her, come to think of it, and she hadn't moved so much as a finger in three days.

She moaned and tried to lift her hand. It began to glow blue and then she dropped it and fell back into sleep.

They had another week on the road before they'd reach Redcliffe and he wasn't sure she'd make it.

* * *

Mina blinked and tried to move. She felt the ground moving beneath her and turned to find where she was. The trees smelled different, but she smelled the _them_. _Thems_ that stole her and will take her to more _thems_. No more forest, no more trees, no more Leki and Essie.

'Leki and Essie', she thought suddenly. Were they dead? She cried out for her friends "Leki", it came out a whisper but Leki and Essie both called to back her. They were in pain, and though she tried to heal, she could barely lift her hand. She fell back into the Fade.


	9. Chapter 9

Mina walked the dark halls of the Fade where demons scattered in her wake. Demons tried to talk to Mina many times, after mother died, but Mina's magic worked in the Fade and Mina's eyes worked in the Fade, and demons fell before they reached her side.

Soon demons no longer tried to even talk to Mina. But she found others there, in the Fade, not demons, but as dangerous and ugly, but on the inside.

And she came across others like herself, who had magic. And some of those thought her a demon and asked about a "Harrowing" and though she tried to tell about the demons only a few listened.

Some talked to the Demons, and the demons replied; and then the others, who were like her but not like her, listened to the demons as if they made sense, instead of sounding like demons. And Mina was confused because she could hear the demons thrashing and snarling and laughing. But the others, who she supposed were not like her at all, must have liked the snarling and thrashing because they listened, and let the demons eat them from the inside out.

And sometimes Mina found others like her, who could see the demons, but they couldn't tell her where the Black City was, and they couldn't tell her where her mother was, and she didn't want to listen to them because they always sounded sad and made her want to cut out their hearts because they didn't kill the demons. And worse, they let the others get eaten.

And once she came to a woman who sounded as Flemeth, but wasn't Flemeth. She was cross like Flemeth, and asked to know how she got here and who she was. But Mina was shamed and didn't want to hear about how about what a bad girl she was or she had sent her mother into the Fade forever. And Mina felt even more shame because she didn't run from demons or darkspawn or Templars or anything, but she had run from that old woman.

And then she was out of the Fade and into the dark of the world again. And Mina could the woman, but that wasn't right because she wasn't in the Fade now. Was she?


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10 - Redcliffe Has Fleas

Redcliffe Castle

Wynne stared down at the girl from the Fade she'd met so many nights ago. She'd been shocked to find a mage entering the fade without Lyrium or blood magic. This one had no blood magic, Wynne was certain of that, and yet there she was, wandering around freely.

The Fade was dangerous for any mage because demons could possess them at any moment, but this girl had seemed immune from the dangers.

Such a frail looking child, thought Wynne. She seemed impossibly small in the oversized leathers the soldiers had put on her. Certainly not big enough to do the things Ser Perth had mentioned. She was an incredible find for the Tower, however.

If mages could learn her secrets of the Fade, she'd lose far less apprentices. While the Circle had freedom and autonomy these last years, the Templars still had work. Many mages still failed the Harrowing and the Circle was forced to let the Templars end it.

A knock brought Wynne out of her reverie.

"Come"

Ser Perth entered but stayed near the door.

"The Arl asked me to see how she does."

"Come here, I'm an old woman and I do not wish to shout, especially next to a sleeping girl"

"She's dangerous, First Enchanter Wynne, and I think no one should be in this room if…when, she wakes up. But I also think it's more dangerous for her to sense me the instant she wakes up. She…we weren't on the best of terms before that arrow."

"Yes, I imagine she'll be panicked to be in a new place, surrounded by strangers. I've wards around the bed, however, and I think we're quite safe from her magic, as you've told me it was unreliable. And I do wish you'd quit using both my title and name, choose one or the other. I've asked you several times."

"Yes First…Wynne. It isn't her magic which should concern you, however. She's almost killed me twice…correction three times, and one of those times I was ready for her. If it's all the same to you, I'll stand here; she seems to sense people through smell. I've orders to cut her down if she makes any attempt on your life, and she's more likely to do so if she senses me upon awakening. I don't think her death would improve either of our lots."

Wynne sighed, thinking how like the Templars Ser Perth sounded. Never questioning anything, only following orders. When she was his age, she questioned everything. And since the Blight and Amell, she'd questioned the Chantry more and more. But she understood a knight had a duty and if they started questioning it, who would protect the people?

"How…how is she?" And the boy sounded genuinely concerned.

"Healing her was easier than any other I've come across. She has strong healing magic in her blood and it seemed to flow through me and with me in the same moments. If this girl can teach any small bit of what she knows, she'll bring more peace to mages than centuries of Templars and the Chantry."

"Of course it didn't help that you lot stuck her in unclean leather jerkins, either"

Ser Perth chuckled, "You'd be grateful if you knew what she was wearing before, Wynne"

And then Mina suddenly sat straight up in the bed, took one long sniff towards Wynne and flew off the side banging into the wards and crumpling right back onto it.

Wynne stood in shock, while Ser Perth had drawn his blade and come to her side instantly.

"She's terrified of you" He looked at Wynne in awe.

"Amazing! Not only does she walk freely in the Fade, but she remembers those she meets by smell." Wynne pointed at the door.

Ser Perth appeared just stared at the girl, sword drawn "I've orders to stay, Wynne, I'm sorry but I do not follow yours."

Wynne scowled but nodded "Do not strike her; she is no danger to me. You were ordered only if she caused me harm and even if she strikes at me, I can handle her, understood"

Ser Perth just stared stoically at the girl.

"Listen to me, I know what I can handle, if I feel in danger I will say so, do you understand?"

Ser Perth hesitated and then nodded, but his posture remained the same, ready to strike.

* * *

Mina smelled him first and then her; the Flemeth, but not Flemeth. Nothing else smelled familiar. She reached her hand out and touched something hard, a wall, but not a wall.

Mina had only been scared like now once, when Flemeth told her the Black City had her mother. And that it was Mina's fault.

Morrigan had come back later and told her that Flemeth meant her mother 'guarded' at the Black City, but Mina had cried all the same.

Then Morrigan had said to stop weeping because no one was going to help her. "You've got to help yourself, child. Get up!" And Morrigan had left and Flemeth had left and Mina was by herself for so long, and no one came when she cried. She was hungry and tired and cold and so alone. Then Leki had brought her a hare and sat down with her and Mina wasn't afraid any longer, even when Flemeth came and made her practice magic then yelled at her when all her spells went wrong. Mina didn't cry. And Mina wasn't scared when Flemeth _stopped_ coming and Morrigan _stopped_ coming either.

Mina didn't ever want to cry again, but she almost did, she almost did, almost. And then she took a breath backed up to another wall. She felt for her daggers, but of course they were gone. She touched her chest and felt something soft, but not soft, and it itched.

* * *

Wynne eyed the girl backed up against the wall at the head of the bed, crouched and scratching her chest. Then as she watched the girl scratched her chest harder, growled, and ripped off the linen shift.

Ser Perth gasped and looked somewhere above her head, but Wynne sensed the shadow of a smile on his face.

"Mina, put that back on!" Wynne was not going to coddle the girl when sternness was called for. This particular girl needed a stern hand, not a warm hug. Though after what Ser Perth had told him of her mother, and upbringing, Wynne ached to hug her.

Mina turned slowly, tilting her head and looked ready to leap like a cat from the bushes. Then she growled, and before Wynne's eyes she twisted and grew fur and stood on all fours on the bed. Wynne stood there stunned and just before she thought this wild creature couldn't get any more feral; the girl peed on the bed.

Wynne closed her eyes, put her hand to her forehead and shook her head. The girl was even wilder than they thought.

"Well, nothing to be done, except teach you that people do not behave as animals. Ser Perth, send for a bathing tub and some buckets of water!"


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11 - The Bath

It had taken a weakness spell, six servants and Ser Perth to get the girl in the bath; with more wards to hold her there. She'd changed from wolf to human at the first bucket of water on the head, but still fought like a wild wolf. While Wynn regretted having male servants witness the girl's bath, the girl seemed indifferent to their stares, and she needed strong men to hold the girl in the tub. Ser Perth, to his credit, tried to stare anywhere but her private bits; of which, all were exposed due to her thrashing about.

When it was all over the girl sat shivering in blankets on the bed looking like a wet cat. Her hair hung, dripping, in her face and she did nothing to move it out of the way. She sat there stoically with chattering teeth and stared into nothing. Wynne had to bring another mage to keep the weakness spell on the girl constantly. Everyone was frazzled and drained.

"Listen to me Mina" Wynne stood in front of the girl "You're not a prisoner here, you're a guest. A guest is someone that can come and go freely." The girl looked up at her, and opened her mouth to speak, Wynne continued "I'm not sure what you've been told about the Templars, but I'm quite sure it wasn't anything good, from what I know about Morrigan. But there are no Templars here."

"Mina k-k-killed no T-t-templars" the girl said, teeth still chattering.

"Yes, dear. I know" And Wynne smiled because compassion was the first human quality she'd seen in the girl. "But you've been in the Fade and seen what happens to some mages?"

"Demons eat them up-p-p. Eat th-th-them up from the in-in-inside" Her chattering was getting worse and she was grateful when Ser Perth stoked the fire and brought new warmth into the chamber.

"Those that get 'eaten up', Mina, they come back here as demons." And Mina cocked her head.

"Mina t-t-tells them not to listen to d-d-demons, but only some listen." Mina t-t-tries to tell them, but they _like_ the demons." Maker, she's been talking to mages in the Fade all this time.

"That's very kind Mina, but not all mages can see demons or feel them as you. Only some can see them, and only some of those can defeat the demon. That's why Ser Perth brought you here, to help us understand how you see the demons and so you can teach us to fight them."

"Lllockk Miinna inn th-th-the towerrr." Mina shook her head.

"No, Mina. You're not to be locked anywhere. You're free because all mages are free now. But I hope you won't go because you can help us, Mina. You can help us teach how to keep the demons away."

The chattering had stopped, but she still shivered. However, Mina looked at Wynne and nodded, slowly and with a suspicious look.

"Good" She slapped her thighs, pleased, "Now we need to talk about your clothing, young lady."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12 – The Taming of the Beast

Mina itched. Mina itched and felt as she was wearing tree bark on the inside, but Wynne wouldn't let her out if she took off the dress. And she needed out to see Leki and Essie in the 'stables' as they called them. And so after she saw them, she went to her chambers where she could take off the dress and walk free without itching, but when she got to her chambers she smelled something.

She felt on the bed and found a leather skirt like hers, but not like hers. It was longer than hers and softer, so much softer than hers. And another piece of leather, which was also soft and which she figured out, eventually by running her hands over and over it, was a top with small flowers braided into the leather.

And her daggers, oh yes, her daggers she could smell them and feel them and more than anything else, she'd missed the feel of those.

Though it took her time to figure how the leather pieces were worn, she was pleased at how they felt; so much better than the dress.

She swung her daggers out in an arc as she took on invisible opponents in front and in back. She danced with the daggers slashing and she felt alive.

* * *

Perthius stood outside her chamber and listened to her eerie, beautiful laughter. He heard the sound of her daggers as they moved through the air. He closed his eyes and pictured her graceful swoops about the room with them, slicing through foes only she could sense and feel.

He smiled, glad that he'd thought of the Dalish leather and went outside to the yards to see about his duties.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13 – Flowers and Marriage

No one at the tower was taking Mina's stay well, especially Mina. Wynne was exasperated, the senior enchanters were flabbergasted, the apprentice mages refused to leave their quarters and Wynne was positive the Templars were hiding, being as she couldn't find a single one most days.

It wasn't just her table manners or lack of social graces, it wasn't the giant cats which were suspiciously satiated all the time, it wasn't even the fact that she consistently talked about herself in the third person (even after repeated scolding), it _was_ the fact that she spent her days finding random people, men and women both, mages and Templars alike, and kissing them directly on the mouth. After she was done, she muttered something about swallowing ants and summarily dismissed the kiss-ee, until she came about the next poor soul.

Wynne was at a loss of words and after the twentieth or so complaint she brought the girl to her office for the fourth chat in three weeks. Which was why Mina sat across from her, arms folded on the desk and chin resting on her hands, looking at Wynne with a completely guileless expression.

"You must stop kissing everyone, Mina. It's not proper."

"OK", the girl said quietly, and Wynne wanted to be suspicious but Mina seemed to have no ability to lie, or perhaps she was just that cunning.

"Where is Ser Perth?"

Ser Perth? Why was she asking about Ser Perth? "He's at the castle, remember." Was something between the girl and the knight? If so, it was highly improper, the girl wasn't experienced enough with life to even understand a man her own age, let alone one nearly twice her age.

"Wynne?", Mina's gaze was empty, but her expression was wistful.

"Yes, child?"

"In the village Mina…_I," she _corrected with emphasis,_ "_watched men give women flowers and the women made cooing sounds like little white doves and then the men kissed them. Whenever I came back to the village the man and woman lived in the man's hut."

"They probably were married Mina. That means they will live together forever and probably have children. And may I say well done on remembering to say 'I'." The child always took compliments well and this was no different. She smiled broadly and sat up placing her hands in her lap. It also appeared the etiquette lessons were finally taking hold.

"Ser Perth gave Mina…" she paused, "gave _me_ flowers." she corrected, looking pleased and fingering her tunic," Does this mean Ser Perth is married to Mina and she should go live in his hut?"

Wynne was always patient with the girl's thought process, even though it left her perplexed most of the time. "Mina, men and women get married because they…care for one another. Or sometimes they get married to…" How did one explain arranged marriages to a girl like Mina? "to make the bond with another family stronger. There have even been wars stopped because a man married a woman from another village. I'm sure if Ser Perth gave you flowers it was because he liked you very much and thought you would like flowers. He did tell me you wore a top made of flowers. But there is much more than kissing or flower-giving to make a marriage."

Mina seemed to think about this, and then nodded.

"Now, there will be no more kissing." Mina nodded again

"And Mina" Wynne said with a smile, "I'm very proud of all the hard work you're doing." At that the girl stood up straight and put her chin in the air.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14 – What a Difference Six Months Make

Mina spent nearly every hour, outside the classroom, in the library having books read to her. For the last six months everyone had been taking turns, but no one complained. Reading to Mina was far less dangerous than having her stalk, kiss and grow angry because you made no ants. And it was all due to the arrival of a bard, there to visit Wynne with news from Orlais and beyond. Before Wynne could even counsel Leliana about Mina, the bard had already begun picking out gowns and slippers for her to try on.

The first week she was there, Leliana began telling the girl tales and reading to her. Mina could sit for hours just listening to the tales. No one, it seemed, was more grateful for her new interest than the Templars, who'd been taking daily beatings from her in the practice yard. Everyone, in fact, was greatly relieved Leliana had come to visit and spent so much time with Mina.

For her part, Leliana seemed to revel in fixing the girl's hair and dressing her in gowns, most which the mages blush and all of the Templars look up at the ceiling when she passed. It seemed the girl taught Leliana much as well, about camouflage and the use of daggers. For three months, until Leliana had to go back on the road, the two were inseparable. And although Mina didn't cry, she seemed rather sad to see Leliana go.

Wynne watched the girl blossoming even after the bard left, however. Like a child becoming an adult, only in Mina's case it was a shorter process. Wynne supposed she could attribute the incredible changes to the books Mina had read to her. She spent so much time in the library; she usually fell asleep and needed to be prodded to bed.

On one such night, Wynne found Mina curled up asleep in a chair. Careful to be gentle, for she'd had a bad experience with the girl's daggers, Wynne woke her up.

* * *

Mina woke up to a voice calling her name softly and shaking her shoulder. She yawned, stretched and nodded for the reader to continue, but was greeted by silence. She couldn't sense the apprentice who began reading to her earlier, but she sensed Wynne close by.

"Sorry Wynne, I did it again"

"You must stop overdoing it, child. You cannot make up for a whole life in such a short time, though it seems you will try your best to do so." Though Wynne was using a scolding tone, Mina could detect the warmth beneath it.

"Yes Wynne" she smiled.

"Oh, don't try and placate me, child, you're still young enough to go over my knee."

"Oh, believe me, I remember" Mina said rubbing her bottom, as she stood. Apparently sleeping potions in the Templar's dinner cups were the last straw for Wynne.

She tucked her arm in Wynne's and let the mage lead her to her rooms; though she could find her way there quite easily nowadays.

"Wynne", she said as the climbed the stairs to the second floor.

"Yes, child?" Sometimes Mina would ask a question just to hear Wynne respond with those words. Today, however, she didn't have to think of a question. She suspected Wynne knew why she phrased hers the same way, in either case.

"What is blushing like? I understand the idea behind it, and books describe it, but no one seems to be able to show me."

Wynne had a wonderful laugh, dry and raspy but whole hearted, and Mina never felt laughed at, only with. She laid her head on the mage's shoulder and somewhere, in the dark recesses of her mind, she felt like she had a mother again.

"Child, all those kisses you were giving out when you first got here, I'm going to guess you felt blushing quite often?"

Mina thought for a moment and then she understood. She nodded and grinned. When they reached her room she brought up something she'd been thinking about for some time, and had actually been her question, but she had avoided it for some reason. She pulled a gold locket from the folds of her robe and rubbed over the top of it.

"Wynne, I know I'm needed here and there is still much to teach, but, well you did say I was free to come and go, did you not?"

"Yes, Mina. You're always free to go. Are you so unhappy here that you wish to leave"

"Oh no! I haven't actually been happy since my mother died, until I came here. I'll never want to leave again, it's just that…" She paused "Wynne, you know where you come from, who you come from, but Flemeth took everything that belonged to my mother, everything except…this locket." And she held it out for Wynne to see. When Wynne took it, she took a deep breath, "I want to know who I am, Wynne. I know why my mother brought me to the wilds and I know I'm no prize for any family, but I just want to know, who she was, where I came from. Do you understand?"

"I understand, Mina, if you think you can handle this, even if they don't accept you or want anything to do with you…?" Mina nodded "Then I think I can help a little. The engraving on this locket seems to be a blazon"

Although she'd heard of the word in some of the books she'd read, she didn't understand exactly what that meant.

Wynne obviously saw her confusion. "A coat of arms. If this was your mother's then she was most likely nobility." She hadn't the heart to tell her it might have been stolen. "I'm not familiar with this particular one, but I'm sure there is a chantry scholar who could help."

"Thank you Wynne," she embraced the older woman, tightly, "And one more request?"

"Yes?"

"Which Templar would accompany me to Redcliffe, do you think?" And they both laughed.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15 – Return to Redcliffe

Leliana came as soon as Mina sent word that she needed an escort. Apparently the Templars had disappeared at the mention of a two day journey with the mage. Though she waited nearly a month for Leliana, Mina wasn't anxious to be going back to Redcliffe. She was glad Leliana took such a long time to get there, but did the woman have to be in such a hurry to leave?

"You didn't ask me to come to sit by your side here at the tower, did you?" Leliana teased.

"No, it's not that. It's…", how could one explain a reluctance and excitement at the same time? "I'm…oh Leliana, am I terrible to look at?"

"But, I have told you that you are beautiful, have I not?"

"Yes, and thank you, but you are a kind person and it's difficult to… Oh, this is in my head but when it reaches my mouth the wrong words come out!" Mina let out a short breath, frustrated.

"Do you mean is it difficult because of your eyes?"

Mina nodded smiled, Leliana always knew the heart of things.

"Your eyes are not easy to look at, but not because they are frightening or something silly like that. I suppose many people can be cruel or superstitious about them, because in all my travels I have not seen their color, but to me they are more beautiful because they are not the same"

Mina's smile grew and she supposed that was the best answer she would have. "It does seem difficult for anyone to speak to my face. I often hear their voices as if they cannot raise their eyes off the floor."

"I shall guess that this is the men, yes?"

A nod.

"I don't think this is because of your eyes."

Now she was really confused. Why would people look at the floor if it wasn't that they couldn't meet her eyes?

"I think that you must not be aware of the things men like to look at most? I thought Wynne had taught you of this?"

Mina was so confused her eyebrows began to hurt from frowning. "Wynne has said I'm to cover my bosom…"

"Yes…" Leliana's laugh seemed to burst forth from her. Mina could only sit and wonder why anyone would stare at her breasts.

"Men are easy to understand and yet they are more complex than anything the Maker created. If men are given the chance to look at your face or you other parts, most will not choose your face. But this is why women are the real power." And Mina could hear Leliana smile.

"Now that you know your eyes aren't the darkspawn's own, we must go. It is two days to Redcliffe and we must arrive during the day, if I'm to rest for an evening performance for the Arl and his guests."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16 - Renewal

While Mina had been apprehensive of going back to Redcliffe, she was relieved when they finally got there. From the waist down everything ached, and from the waist up everything drooped. She was so tired that she was sure her shoulders must be dragging somewhere behind her on the road. And just when the worst part about being traveling (being tired, sweaty and smelly) was over, the skies open up and drop a bucket of water on your head.

It was these things that Mina was thinking as they arrived at the bridge to Redcliffe castle, wet, bedraggled and aching from head to foot. Correction, when _she_ arrived in that state, Leliana sang and told tales the entire journey in such a state of joy that it forced Mina to develop a permanent scowl.

"Tell me why I left the forest again?" She moaned at Leliana, who walked slightly ahead of her. She was so chipper that Mina thought several times about using her boots to cause Leliana the same discomfort she suffered.

"You could not resist the lure of a beautiful pair of Orlesian shoes?"

"Ah, yes. The blind girl wishes more beautiful shoes. How could I forget", she scoffed, smiling.

"Oh, but I would tell you if they were not beautiful. Just as I will tell you now that you must brush your hair because I fear you shall be mistaken for one of these Ferelden hounds after a bath."

Mina couldn't help it, she giggled. "And why should I worry about my hair?"

And she heard Leliana slow to walk beside her "Because there is a very intense knight gazing on your person at this moment, and the red hair tells me it is your Ser Perth."

Mina's tummy did several flips and she raised her hand to smooth her hair.

* * *

Perthius watched the two women approach from the top of the stairs. At first he only recognized the bard, but as the soft tinkling of bells rang in his ears he knew who the second guest was. As she came into view he couldn't have torn his eyes away if the Archdemon barreled out of the sky and landed on the step in front of him.

Her hair was longer and wavy, nearly down to her shoulders, and random braids were tangled up with pink ribbon at the ends. She wore a dress of dark blue and silver, with silver slippers and she even had coloring on her eyes. She was more stunning than he remembered and he caught himself transfixed by her soft pink lips. Then she lifted her face toward him and he could see chest rise as she inhaled deeply. And then she smiled.

* * *

Mina stopped for a moment and then smiled. Then she did everything Wynne had told her not to. She lifted her gown above her knees and she ran. She ran directly up to Ser Perth and wrapped her arms around his neck, tightly. He stood there for a moment and when his arms finally wrapped around her, and she heard his soft chuckle, she thought her cheeks would break from smiling.

"Hello, Ser Perth" she whispered in his ear.

And he felt wonderful and strong and everything she remembered and dreamed of these six months. She turned into his neck and took a deep breath and drank in his smell; clean, crisp water from the base of the mountain, and she felt her stomach flip again.

"Hello Mina. You look beautiful."

Mina flushed with delight, but didn't let go of him.

"You must let go now" he whispered in her ear, and she could feel his face heating, but she could feel his smile as well, and, best of all, she could smell his joy. Reluctantly, she let him go.

"You remember Leliana", she said as Leliana approached.

"I was here but a few months ago, goose. Hello, Ser Perth."

"Ah, the Arl will be pleased at your return. Although, I cannot say the same for you, little one" and he touched her nose.

Mina frowned at the touch, feeling like a small child. Suddenly, as sure as she was about how she felt about him, she wasn't sure about how he felt about _her_.

"Why would the Arl be displeased at Mina's visit?" Leliana asked as they moved inside the castle.

"Ah, I misspoke, it's not for me to say really, but I believe he expected Mina to help Connor with his magic abilities."

"I will be going back soon I believe, but Connor has much of my knowledge and practices daily at…but you don't want to know about demons and magic."

"Mina, I am going to settle in my chambers. I will come by before dinner to help with…to talk."

Mina smiled and shooed her friend with a wave of her hand.

"Ser Perth, will you help Mina to her chambers? I have to rest if I am to perform this eve."

Naughty Leliana, thought Mina, wanting to hug and swat the dear girl at the same time.

"It would be my pleasure" He placed Mina's hand on his arm and began walking again.

"You're taking well to your studies at the tower?"

"Yes. It feels odd to think of it is home when I've only been there little more than half a year."

"You wrote that you required information from the scholars here?"

"Mmm. I've come to learn about my mother. I've a locket with a..mmm…cat of arms."

He chuckled, "A coat of arms"

"Yes" and she frowned because he had that same voice Wynne took when she was being corrected.

They walked in silence for a moment. "I meant what I said, you're looking lovely. I must say, that I almost miss you speaking of yourself as 'Mina'", and she could feel a little sadness from him.

"Do you not miss anything else" She stopped walking and waited for him to turn to her.

"Mina…I" and she reached up and pressed her lips to his.

He seemed to freeze, and then she felt his arms around her waist and his hands at her back. Her arms wound around his neck holding him closer. And then she was drowning. Heat and light soared through her and something churned, molten and hot inside her belly. She was breathing but breathless and lost in the taste of him. His tongue slipped inside her mouth and she moaned against him as it touched hers.

Everything about this kiss was right and perfect. This was the feeling she longed for all these months. And then she understood that it wasn't just _kissing_ that made this feeling, it was kissing _him_. He made swarm of bees buzz in her belly. And she wanted more, so much more and then he pulled away and she cried out for the loss of him.

Both of them stood there breathing heavily, but she took one step towards him and he backed away. "Mina no", and she was confused because he said no, but she could feel him like a prey feels when stalked. He wanted her as well, she was sure of it. But maybe all these months in the tower made her confused and he didn't want her at all.

"I, I'm sorry, Ser Perth", she said quietly, "You've asked me not to do that, but I just can't seem to not kiss you. The ants start swarming and then…" then she heard someone in the hall.

"Ser Perth, the Arl has requested a meeting." One of the guards she supposed.

"Mina…," he began, sounding like Wynne again when she was about to get scolded, "we'll talk about this later, all right?"

Mina nodded and took a shaky breath.

"Take our guest to her chambers." he said to the guard and then he was off.


	17. Chapter 17

I think that songs define a person's feelings. In that vein I thought I would share the playlist I listen to while I write, to sort of temper the mood. Tonight as I write this I have Bad Romance and Fireflies (by Owl City) on repeat. It's a very weird mixture, which might explain this rather angsty text =D.

And thank you for the kind words about the story. I've had this character in my head for years, but no place to put her. Thank you David Gaider for your wonderful world where Mina fits perfectly!

* * *

Chapter 17 – Too Old for Kissing Too Young for Love

The night was dark and deadly, but Mina was the wolf, the hunter, muscle and ferocity pumping her blood, and nothing deadly stood a chance. The wolf was the most comfortable form she took, but it wasn't the easiest to transform into. It craved blood and more often than not, she ended up hunting. The wolf was free though, free of magic, of fear, of any feelings that weren't visceral.

Her senses were keener as the wolf, if that was possible, and the smallest band of darkspawn were always flushed out. If there were more than three, she stalked as human, but anything less and the wolf was rewarded. Tonight the wolf took down two darkspawn scouts as they walked the paths near the lake below the castle. The wolf was rewarded tonight, and Mina snuck back into the castle with her heart still pounding.

She had skipped dinner (and Leliana's company, something which the bard took personally), earlier because she couldn't face Ser Perth. Well that _and_ it was uncomfortable being at a table with noble men and women, even if the Arl was kind enough to make her feel welcomed. Hunting inedible darkspawn almost made her regret skipping it, however, and her tummy muttered its displeasure. When she closed the door to her rooms and leaned against the door she smelled him immediately.

"I thought you might be hungry so I bought a little bread" he had that amused sadness about him again, and Mina wanted nothing more than to soothe the sadness and draw out the joy.

"Thank you," she said it quietly but she knew he heard. She suddenly wasn't hungry, the bees were back, swarming around, but she put a tiny piece of bread in her mouth. She wanted it to taste wonderful, but it felt like ash in her mouth and she could barely swallow it. She closed her eyes and just held the bread in her hands.

"Maker, Mina I'm sorry, but you must know by now that you cannot go around kissing men, and especially men nearly old enough to be your father."

"You are not my father." She pointed out, needlessly. "And I cannot help how I feel about you or how you make me feel"

"Andraste's..." he stood up, sounding vexed and Mina just sighed, waiting for the ax to fall, as it were. "You cannot say things like that Mina."

"Am I to speak false or shall I just put my feelings in a cup then?"

"No", she felt him kneeling at her feet, "things like that should be said to a boy your age, whispered during stolen moments."

"I'm no child. While I have not mated, I understand the act itself. And Mina…" she blew out a disgusted breath, hating herself for sounding like that wolf inside "And _**I **_need no coddling. I understand you have no…wanting of me, but I do not need to be scolded again nor told to dabble with schoolboys. Do men not take kisses when they thinks another wants the kiss? And I'm sorry I thought you wanted the kisses."

"Mina, it isn't that I…" And she couldn't hold back the tears now, they leaked through her eyes, although she squeezed them tight as possible.

"Mina, dear Maker, Mina," he grabbed her hand and held it against his neck," does it feel as if I'm not attracted to you?" And she could feel the sparrow in his heart beating as if to come out of his chest, and she wanted to kiss him but he had said no so many times and so she put two fingers on his mouth and he pressed his lips against them and then she just couldn't help herself she opened her mouth and whispered a breathless "Please."

* * *

'Please' was all she said and no sane man could resist that plea. He laid his hand against her cheek and leaned in for one small kiss. He couldn't deny her, or himself, one small kiss. What could one small kiss hurt?

His lips grazed hers and she was so soft and warm that he groaned in defeat. She wrapped her legs and arms around him and opened her mouth eagerly. And of course she had been shape shifting so she had nothing on beneath the cloak, which made him ache even more. He was lost in the taste and smell of her. Her tears created a salty trail down her cheek and he brushed his lips over the trail. She was shuddering and shaking in his arms and making mewling sounds that drove him crazy.

His hand touched her knee and then slid up the side of her thigh as his lips moved down her neck. She arched her back and the mewling sounds became tiny pants. Maker, she was so soft and warm; soft as silk.

"If you aren't going to tal…" Leliana stopped inside the door, took one look at the scene before her and said, "Well, I will see you in the morning and we'll talk then" and turned around and left, sporting a smile. And then he looked at her, face flushed, breathing heavy, and lips bruised and red, and he felt shame at his inability to control himself.

Gently he took her cloak and wrapped it back around her. Maker, if Leliana hadn't walked in, he would have taken her then and there. She was so beautiful, her spirit so alive that she left him breathless. He stood there for some time trying to get himself under control. He was grateful for her silence under the circumstances.

"When then? When are you no longer too old and I am no longer too young. Shall it forever be like this? That I am too young and you are too old?"

"It's not the only thing wrong with this…" This what? They barely knew each other. And I am a knight dedicated to Redcliffe, he reasoned with himself. And she was a mage, a secret place in his heart chastised. And she was a mage.

"Oh, more of your holy books? Perhaps your holy books tells you as the Templars, that I am defiled and sinful?"

No, he didn't believe that at all. In fact, he thought, she proved that the Chantry was wrong about magic. About mages. "No, Mina, there isn't anything defiled about you, unless you consider what I just did to you" he smiled ruefully. "I know it doesn't make sense to you, but it would be wrong of me to take advantage of you." He brought her chin up, "And you deserve so much better" he lightly caressed the soft skin of her cheek with his lips, closed his eyes and inhaled the scent of the forest one last time. Then he straightened and left, before he was too weak not to finish what they started.

* * *

Mina sat with her hand over her cheek with her eyes closed. She felt herself sinking, sinking. Time felt like a battle, when the world moved as if wading through sand. So slowly, in fact, that her heartbeat slowed until she was sure it would stop of its own accord. And she missed Wynne and Leki and Essie, who she would lay with and take comfort with when she was homesick or sad. And just as she felt more alone than she ever had, Leliana slipped an arm around her middle and began to sing softly in her ear.

Sleep soon claimed her and tonight, in the Fade, for the first time, Mina didn't look for her mother.


	18. Chapter 18

Forgive these last chapters of mistakes, my beta was unable to complete them so I'm posting them unbeta'd. While I've read them several times for errors, I probably still missed a few.

* * *

18. Chapter 18 – A Beginning and An End

While wallowing in self pity weren't one of her strongest traits, Mina finally understood the desire. Rather than give in, however, she removed Leliana's hand from her waist and got dressed.

Early mornings were the most beautiful sounds in Ferelden. She loved the first glows of sunlight in her dark world and the fresh smells of a cold morning. The quiet mornings here, and in the tower, were unnerving at first, almost as if the world was asleep. In her forest she woke up greeted by birds singing, trees swaying and branches cracking under the foot of the forest's denizens. After a while, the quiet was welcome and she came to both love and hate the feeling that darkspawn, or other creatures, weren't prepared to take her down at any moment.

When the quiet overwhelmed her, as it did now, she would climb to the highest spot and jump, listening to the wind in her ears.

Perthius was leaning against the wall atop the battlements, hidden in the shadows of one of the east towers. He came out most mornings to await the dawn and get away from the uneasy quiet of the indoors. The view of the mountains was spectacular from the east; but it was also perfect for spotting danger or travelers.

His eyes roamed to the west, towards Lake Calenhad. The sky was overcast and there was a slight chill in the air, but the sun still lit the world afire. It was the shadows on the tower to the west that caught his attention, however, and not the mountains of Redcliffe or the lake.

Mina stood at the top of the tower her cloak and hair whipping around her. Andraste herself couldn't have looked more beautiful than this silver-white haired angel atop the towers. He cloak fell from her and floated to the battlements and she spread her arms arching her back. His breath caught and his body tensed. It wasn't her naked form that captured him; it was her sheer glory and abandon. Her skin glistened and sparkled in the sunlight and her smile was brighter than the sun.

His hands clenched and his heart pounded and he watched in horror, helpless as she leapt from the tower.

He was grateful for the choice of leathers this morning and not armor, although he could run almost as fast in either case. He stopped at the top of the west wall and closed his eyes, before looking down. "Maker, please" he whispered his silent prayer. The ground below was empty. His relief was palpable, although he couldn't get his heart rate under control.

A sparrow landed on the wall to his left and cocked its head.

"Maker girl, you scared the life out of me." He laughed in relief and turned to rest his back against the stone. She shifted and without shame sat next to him, still atop the wall, staring out the opposite way. Maker help him, but it felt almost natural and right to have her there with her knees up and her arms wrapped around her legs, cheek resting atop one knee; sitting so casually so high above the ground.

He went over and retrieved her cloak. Wrapping it around her, his hand lingering longer than it should on her shoulder. She turned her face slightly and pressed her cheek against it. He heard her small quiet sigh when he moved his hand away.

"Did you know your mother" And her voice was barely audible above the wind.

"My mother was a knight in the King's army" he smiled "She was a fierce maiden who died fighting the Orlesians more than thirty years ago"

"Oh." No apologies from her and for that he was grateful. He hated pity. "Was she very kind?"

"She was a good woman and, yes, she was very kind, in her way."

"And your father?"

"Also a soldier. He died during the same war, although at a later time."

"Do you remember them so well?" she asked still staring out at the distant lake.

"Hmmm?" he said distantly. He found it difficult to keep his eyes off her. The blue in her skin was so subtle but in the morning light it could have been the sky. His eyes trailed down her back following the tangled mess of hair. His fingers ached to tangle themselves in the softness of the tendrils.

* * *

"Do you…" and she turned towards him.

Mina heard the distraction in his voice. She turned towards him and she could sense his body prepared to coil and strike, as a snake. She bit her lip because she knew there was no danger nearby; the wind carried every scent for miles. She was afraid to move, afraid he might not touch her.

Sometimes when Mina sensed a hurt animal in a trap she crawled to it and kept very still until it tired itself out and allowed her to release the trap. She heard that same heartbeat from his chest and felt that same tension within his body. So she waited for him to tire and give in. And then she heard his hand drop to his side.

She sighed and turned back to feel the wind from the lake again. She understood, now, why he smelled of the water. The lake mist blew up frequently and dusted over them as they stood. Her teeth began to chatter. He picked her up in his arms and carried her back to her rooms.

Leliana still lay snoring lightly face down on the bed. Mina grinned and felt him grin in response. As he placed her softly next to Leliana, he laid a soft kiss on her forehead and left. Mina snuggled until Leliana turned on her side, spooning her and this time, as Mina fell into sleep, she was smiling.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19 – A Search of Sorts

The Reverend Mother was a kind soul with a young voice and the smell of fresh baked sweets. Mina immediately thought of Wynne when she spoke, although they sounded very different. While Wynne had a soft voice, this woman's could have been half her age, and for all Mina knew, she was.

Age was something she'd become more curious about of late. She tried to listen to voices to determine ages, but other than the very young, or the very old, there were only slight differences in the cadence. Age, she determined, seemed to come from the words spoken, not the tones. She questioned Leliana about it while the bard braided Mina's hair earlier that morning.

"_Well, I suppose it is very hard to tell age even for those of us with eyes. As you say, the young and very old have different sounds, they also have different looks. You have touched Wynne's face, no?" Mina nodded, listening attentively "Wynne is very old, and of course most of the Templars and apprentices are very young."_

"_And Ser Perth?" she tried to sound casual._

"_Ah" and she could hear the smile in Leliana's voice "He is I think older than me, perhaps by ten years, it is difficult to tell with soldiers, they are hardened so. But he seems very young still and handsome" Leliana moved her mouth next to Mina's ears, "and very virile."_

_Mina could not help the laugh. It just burst from her. "And what good does him being handsome matter to a blind girl? Hmm?"_

"_Only that you will have magnificently, gorgeous children." Leliana said lightly. "Your hair is finished."_

"_Oh, Leliana without you I would go mad in this world of people. They're always treating me as though I'm half a person because I cannot see, all the while I can see twice as much as they. If not for you or Wynne I think I'd be poking daggers through their eyes!" Mina laughed softly and grasped her friend's hand._

"_And Ser Perth."_

"_Hmm?" Mina knitted her brows._

"_If not for me, Wynne __**and**__ Ser Perth. I do not think he treats you as anything less than a whole person."_

"_No, he just treats me as a whole child."_

"_He does not look at you as though you were a child" she hear Leliana's smile, "And I believe I shall go have a talk with him if last night is how he acts around children!"_

"_You're terrible Leliana, but perfect" And she dissolved into laughter._

The Chantry library was barely half the size of the one at the tower and Mina couldn't imagine there was much information to get gathered in this place. But the Reverend Mother had said they had books devoted to coats of arms and sent one of the sisters to help them sort through the information.

The locket apparently had engraving, but at one time had also had colored sections on the designs, something very important in determining the coat of arms. As it was it seemed they would be researching it for quite a while.

Mina could find no way to help and felt the frustration of uselessness; at least until Leliana's brilliance came up with a plan to narrow down some of the research.

Mina was sitting at a table with her feet on the tale. Though the sisters tsk-ed and made other disapproving sounds she practiced cracking her knuckles and sharpening her daggers, the same daggers which caused her to lift her skirt up to her waist to retrieve them.

Leliana, being Leliana, only looked at Mina's legs and then covered her them with the skirts. "Mina," she said, looking up from her book "What can you remember about your Mother?"

"Not much I'm afraid" Mina said with a sigh "She had a sound like yours, but not like yours"

"You mean she sang as I do?"

"No, her talk was like yours, different from theirs, but not very different" Mina said, waving a hand around the room. "If Orlesians sound like you and the Arlessa, she was not Orlesian, but if the sound is similar…"

"Did she have a name she called you? Or a story she told?"

"If it is helpful, her name was Mirina."

She heard Leliana's chair move abruptly. "But, Mirina is a name I'm quite familiar with, tis a tale I tell often in Orlais. Perhaps it is coincidence then, but...the name…it must be."

Mina's heart was beating so loud in her ears she thought the whole room must be looking at her wondering at the sound. She leaned forward towards Leliana's voice, "You haven't told this story to me?"

"Ah there are so many tales I have not told you, my Mina." She said wistfully."I heard this tale once from a large Qunari man who fought bravely and honorably during the last blight. I cannot say if this is legend or fact. And, of course, I do not tell it as he does. It is a tale of a woman who was said to be the descendent of the Archon Valerius. As such she was much revered by her people. She was a great beauty, but unlike her distant ancestor she was also compassionate and kind."

"While the wars waged with the Qunari people, she wept for the loss of her people and theirs. It is said that on one such night a mage found her weeping over a field of slain Qunari warriors and his anger at her tears over Qunari barbarians caused him to force himself on her. But she was only partly descendent from Valerius." Leliana's voice lowered and Mina practically fell off her chair trying to get closer to it, "She also had Dalish blood. The blood of the warrior women of the Dalish clan was strong and she fought fiercely against him."

Leliana's voice was now even quieter, almost a whisper. The Chantry was dead silent, not even a cough escaped the lips of the sisters and brothers inside.

Mina was enraptured by this story, both angry and incensed, but cheering on the warrior woman.

"The mage, however, wasn't through with his assault. He called upon demons and blood magic and forced his way with her. And in the blood magic and the joining, the demons rose up and grabbed the mage by the throat. One of the demons held him aloft and spoke to him and he accepted it inside him. The demon possessed the blood mage and as they completed their joining the woman drove her daggers through its skull."

Everyone was on the edge of their seats, but Leliana grew quiet. She waited until she heard murmurs filing the walls of the room, "go on", "then what happened", "what about the woman?"

"The woman went home and soon realized she was with child. Her babe grew and she could feel it inside the womb. Her love for her child eclipsed any sadness and she forgot where it came from. When the babe was born she…"And Leliana paused on a gasp so small, only Mina caught it.

"She…she what?" Mina wanted to throttle the woman.

Leliana spoke softly and slowly "She had skin the color of the clearest ocean and hair the color of snow under the winter sun." Mina's head turned to the collective gasp from around the room.

"The child was born with the most amazing abilities." Leliana continued, still speaking very slowly. "One story told of a storm created not long after the babe was born."

Mina didn't need to hear the rest, she touched her hair trying to feel if it was as they said, but she had no idea what snow looked like or the ocean. Was her skin these strange colors they spoke of? Was her hair? Was this her story? She was created by demons?

Mina bounded out of her chair and realized with even greater humiliation that _he_ was standing at the doorway and had probably heard what she was.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20 – Ser Perth

Perthius had been a knight since he was born. With both parents being soldiers he knew every day he lived that he wished to dedicate his life to Ferelden, to Redcliffe. He avoided romantic entanglements because his duty was everything to him. He loved his country and the Arl, but most of all he loved Redcliffe. 'A man cannot serve two mistresses', his mother had once said, 'He must choose one and serve her completely and devotedly.

He'd attended battles for more than just the Arl, as the Arl's armies were used at several borders to fight back any insurgence. He'd thought about joining the Grey Wardens, after his experience at the blight. However, it was just those experiences that showed him how much his own people needed him, needed knights. If he had been absent during the castle infestation, so much evil would have wiped out the town. He would die, gladly, to save any one of his soldiers or townsmen. No, he was needed here to fight and save the lives of the people he had grown up with and fought the blight with. And for thirty seven years that is what Perthius had done, until she came into his life.

He watched her flee from the library and started to go after her. She was angry and frightened, to be sure, and he wanted to comfort her. If only he could _just_ comfort her, he would go to her now, but his own body betrayed him time and time again when he was near her.

Mina, with her wild abandon and strange accent. Mina, with her compassion and extraordinary fighting skills. Mina, whose beauty could rival a goddess. How is one man to resist her innocent seduction? He'd fought off hordes of darkspawn during night after night of assault on the castle and town and yet he couldn't fight his feelings for this one little mage. Even now he wanted to go to her and hold her. He leaned against his library wall, eyes closed, fists clenched, trying to keep from going to her.

His duty was to man the Arl's army. He had troops to think about, men to train. While the blight was finished, the Orlesians always threatened, and darkspawn were never eradicated. He had a duty, and only one mistress to attend to. Opening his eyes he headed towards the practice yard to attend the daily training sessions.

He had to stay away from her, for both of their sakes.


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21 – Indignity

The pain inside was unbearable. She wished to rip her own heart out and tear it to shreds. She wished to burn down the world. She wished to rip out everyone's hearts so they could not break like hers was doing.

She screamed from the depths of her soul and it came out of her fingers as fire. Her fingers splayed and she shot fire at the bed, and she listened with satisfaction as it turned to dust within seconds. The ground began to quake below her and she stood there while everything fell and burned around her. The flames licked at her side but she wouldn't move. She would burn, like the demon she was.

Ser Perth was halfway to the training yard when he heard the blood curdling scream from her room. He ran as if Andraste herself blew at his back and flung open the door.

Mina stood at the heart of the chamber, fire and smoke engulfed most of the room. The room, having no windows, was drowning out the flames, but as he watched she shot fire from her hands towards the bed and the room began to burn anew. Flames were shooting out from everywhere.

"Mina stop, Maker's breath, stop" he screamed to her. He was making his way through the flames and, although terrified of her, he reached her side just as the flames licked the ceiling. He'd put one hand on her arm but she pushed it out against his chest. Suddenly he was flung from the room and she slammed the door shut.

Getting up again he tried the door. Smoke was billowing out through cracks in the door and from all sides but he couldn't open it. 'Maker, please' he begged, throwing himself against the door again. And then he heard a thump from inside the room and the door clicked. He tore open the door and found her lying, overcome by smoke, at the foot of what was left of the bed. The flames had been spent against the stone and enclosed room, but the room was full of smoke. He could barely breathe as he pulled her out to the hall, coughing.

Her dress was burned, as was she along her arms and legs. He was afraid to touch her, but more afraid not to. She was motionless and he couldn't see if her chest rose and fell.

Leliana was standing and crying over and over again, "No, no, no", and he couldn't think, he couldn't think. "Shut up and tell me how to fix her" he demanded.

Leliana took a deep breath and seemed to gather herself. "Wake her up, if you can, she can heal herself" Leliana said through shaky breaths.

But he didn't know how to wake her except to shake her. "Get Patri" he yelled towards a guard standing over them. Patri was the only skilled healer nearby, although all he could offer was bandaging, really. And then she coughed and he nearly fell over in relief.

"Mina, heal yourself." He whispered, frantically and was astounded when she shook her head.

"Mina dies. Wants dies." She said, coughing.

"Are you so selfish you would leave Wynne and Leliana like this?" He wanted to shake her shoulders. '_And me'_, he wanted to shout. But she was thinking of what he said. It hurt her, he could tell by her expression. He didn't care, as long as she lived. "It's selfish and cruel to leave your friends because you are too much a coward to live!" Her face was agony now and, Maker, how he wanted to take it all back. But then her hand shone with a familiar faint blue light and he watched the light slowly travel up her arm and then across her chest. Soon her whole body trembled and was engulfed in the glow. Her wounds began to disappear. Andraste's eyes, her healing powers were frightening and awe inspiring.

* * *

Leliana flew by her friend's side and gathered her up in her arms. "I'm sorry, Mina. I should never have told you that story. It's just a story, don't you see? They're tales to tell us the right path or sometimes the path that someone wants us to walk. It doesn't have to be true."

Mina listened to Leliana and wanted to believe what she said, but deep down she knew the story was true; at least the part about the demon, because hadn't she been so different? Hadn't they told her she was like an animal? And hadn't she taken delight in the sound of her blade slicing through flesh? Hadn't she howled as the wolf in excitement, when she tore their throats out and felt their thrashing beneath her claws as the tore through the chest? And how could she be human, then?

And how could he ever want her, now?


	22. Chapter 22

Ser Perth visited the kitchens on rare occasions, and tonight was one of them. The entire day was trying and between the practice yard and Mina, he'd barely eaten a thing. He poked his head in briefly to see if the cook was in and spotted Mina sitting on one of the counters, although there were chairs and tables not two steps from her.

"Mina, come off the counters, there is a table and chairs directly in front of you!"

She gave a husky laugh that had no mirth, "Animals sit not in chairs. Mina sits on tables or on floor. Floor is cold."

His heart nearly broke in two pieces. "You're not an animal, Mina" he said quietly, fiercely.

"Mina isn't animal, Mina is demon. Mina is darkspawn"

"Don't say such things", he whispered vehemently. He looked at her then, still black from the soot all over, still wearing the rags from earlier, although they burned and torn. Her hair was matted and streaked with black. "Mina, go and change clothes and clean up." He ordered. When she didn't move, he tried a kinder voice, "You'll feel better once you're clean."

She ripped the garments off her body and they fell beside her on the counter. He blew out an exasperated breath. Although there was nothing remotely arousing about her situation, it was impossible to feel nothing when he saw her. He closed his eyes and took several deep breaths.

She had a piece of cheese sitting in her hand and he noticed small pieces of cheese on the floor beneath her feet. As he watched she relaxed her hand and the cheese rolled from her hand onto the floor, but she hadn't moved a muscle. He felt ashamed at his arousal, even though it was unbidden.

"Get up!" He barked and closed his eyes when she started and hung her head.

"Get up, I said!" Pleased when her back went straight, even though she still looked defeated.

He stepped towards her, softening his voice he said, "Mina, you can sit there feeling sorry for yourself or you can…" and then she grabbed his tunic and pulled him to her, her lips covering his, and her hands were ripping his tunic. He wanted to feel nothing. He wanted to remember why she smelled of smoke and fire, but all he could think about was her hands and mouth.

Her hand scratched down his chest and he sucked in a breath as she moved it lower, while gripping his torn tunic and pulling him even closer to her with the other. He stood between her legs and balanced his hands on either side of her.

She pushed his mouth open with her tongue and with one hand freed him from his pants. Maker help him he couldn't do this, but he couldn't stop. 'Mina, Maker…' his thoughts lost as her hand gripped him and slid up and down his shaft. He gasped against her lips and the muscles in his body tensed. He barely noticed when her lips left his. His forehead was pressed against hers as she stroked him, and his fingers were bleeding from digging into the stone counter on either side of her thighs, but still he clung to it.

Her breath was coming in pants and he tried to pull away, or thought he did, except he hadn't moved. And then he felt the beginning of knot in his belly and couldn't move away now if the ceiling began falling. His eyes were closed and he could feel every breath he took with hers.

"Mina's!" she whispered, fervently. And yes, possessed, he was possessed, by her. She was in his blood, coursing through his veins.

He was falling and falling and he'd lost all thought, and nothing mattered but the rhythmic motion of her hand and her fevered breath. He felt the knot in the depths of his belly begin to release slowly, making him tense his body. As the knot unraveled, his arms were the only parts of his body keeping him standing. A damn burst inside his belly and rivers of water flowed through it. His body spasmed, as he came with a growl, bucking his hips and spilling into her hands and onto her legs. His body jerked as she continued pumping her hand.

"Mina's!" She said again louder. And he shuddered one last time against her. He stood there shaking and breathing heavily, forehead still pressed against hers.

The world came crashing into reality with the gasp and crash of someone behind them. Perthius turned to see skirts fleeing around the corner. He looked down at himself and flushed and then looked at her and the flush grew. Even while desire warred with his embarrassment he tried to compose himself. He laced his pants and stepped away from her.

"Get dressed and go to your new rooms" he hissed. He was barely able to speak.

He stood, his back to her, while he heard her get up and leave.


	23. Chapter 23

Mina felt free for the first time in months. She didn't need their clothes or rules. She refused to wear the clothes back to her chambers. She ignored the intake of breath several guards and servants took as she passed through the halls. She just wanted to go home. In fact, she would have gone back to her little hut now, if not for Leki and Essie being at the tower.

The tower, she thought, who now wouldn't want her because they would know; they would know she could see demons because she was a demon. The Tower, she took a shaky breath, who would want to kill her because she had failed a Harrowing before even being born.

She wanted to peel off her own skin layer by layer until she found the demon at and took her daggers to it.

She smelled Leliana in the room when she entered. Leliana took her into her bosom and held her, singing softly and rocking back and forth while they sat on the bed.

The singing had stopped and Leliana had only a whisper for words "Mina, you will only listen to me, you will not speak," she ordered "If you want people to stop treating you as a child, you will stop acting like one! Whatever or whoever your father was, you are not he." Mina wanted to deny Leliana, but she'd never heard Leliana angry and it was intimidating.

"A child would believe a story like that to be true, but a woman would know that demons do not spare the lives of men, especially men that try to kill them. A demon does not love, as you love Wynne and me and Ser Perth. "

Mina was listening and she wanted to believe, oh how she wanted to believe Leliana's words. "Mina…" she began, but then Leliana deserved more than that, "_**I**__…._do you think…", and what could she ask? Do you think the tower would want me back? Who could want me now? Would he ever want me? And she didn't ask, because she didn't want the answer.

And there was his smell.

"A word please." He stood near the door.

"I shall go," Leliana rose from the bed.


	24. Chapter 24

Ahhh…the angst had to stop! Sorry for anyone that liked it! (did anyone like it??!). Thank goodness for Fireflies by Owl City because I needed a little light heartedness and it just brought my mood up up up!

* * *

While Perthius used to take great comfort in his sword, he had to admit he took more comfort from her presence. She stood a few feet behind him and next to Leliana, but he could sense her. He'd seen her skills and was proud to admit that hers were far superior to his (that was difficult to achieve for he was well known for his swordsmanship).

He was afraid she would take his scolding last night badly, but she had withstood the angry words.

"_The Arl has opened his home to you and you repay him by setting his guest rooms ablaze. If you cannot control your magic, it's best you go back to the tower." Her response had been to hold her head high and nod. And, although surprised she had not argued back, he let the subject drop._

He'd watched her again this morning, flying off the battlements. He had smiled as she soared over the lake and then he had lost sight of her. He couldn't imagine a day of not seeing her take that glorious dive. But, it was inevitable she would return to the tower. For now, he would be content with the time he had to just watch.

He was overseeing the training in the yard when she came out in her Dalish leather. Most of the men had heard of her prowess with blades, and at first, many gave her wide berth. As they watched her practice, however, many came closer to observe her skill; a couple were even brave enough, eventually, to ask for teaching.

Since she could not see, she had to stand behind them and place her hands on their arms as they moved the sword or daggers. And as he watched her lay her hands on one after another, he willed himself to be indifferent. It was the third lad who suddenly stepped up to ask about "how to hold the daggers and something or other" when decided he'd had enough.

She had her arms around Mathews, who was to be grinning from ear to ear and nodding. Her cheek was against his and she was whispering and moving their arms in unison.

"Mathews! You have archery work to complete." He wasn't jealous, he insisted. He simply didn't need lovesick children in his ranks.

"And I don't see why you have to have your hands all over them for teaching. You don't see me pawing at my men to teach them swords."

"Perhaps that is why your men cannot hold the blade as well as I?" His face burned as Leliana chuckled. Then the bard whispered something in Mina's ear which made her lips do the most amazing little twitches and he felt his tongue move out to lick his own in response. He closed his eyes and forced himself to turn back to the archery boards.

He was grateful she went indoors.

* * *

She appeared next to him like a wraith, hours later, head held high and fresh faced. He tried not to breathe in her scent, but the smell of the forest and something liked spiced bread worked itself under his nose.

"You are a knight?" she asked flippantly.

"Yes", his eyebrows knitted together. What was she up to? He was thinking they were playing another of her word games. He always seemed to end up the loser during those, however.

"Hmmph" She said, nose still in the air. "Are knights not brave?"

"I suppose some knights are brave, some are also cowardly or bald for that matter. Is this conversation meant to impugn my bravery?" he was smiling despite himself. She looked very perturbed. Maker, but he'd miss her when she went back to the Tower. One thing he was grateful for was her reverting back to first person, the other almost felt like a punishment.

"I do not know this word, but if you mean to ask if I question your bravery then no, I do not." she paused a moment, "There is no question, you are a coward."

He felt his eyebrows rise in surprise and, a little annoyance. Cruelty wasn't her nature, so he was sure there was some bait here. He fell for it anyway.

"You think I'm a coward?" he asked, still smiling.

"No"

And now he was confused.

"I know you're a coward." He stood there stunned. All conversation around the yard stopped.

She faced him with her damn pert little nose in the air.

"If you were a man, I would call you out!" he said softly. And probably get slaughtered for my honor, he thought.

"If you were a man I would have been in your bed for months" she replied loudly.

He blinked.

"You…you…" she'd gone mad again; questioning his manhood in front of his men, announcing her wanton behavior aloud.

She walked up to him, inches from his face. "You run from me like a coward when I can feel your stares on me through the day. Did you think that because I was blind I could not sense your stares? Is it my magic? Are you frightened I am possessed? Why does a knight who faces the blight run from simple kisses?"

He blinked.

His mind was blank.

Then suddenly it wasn't blank, it was filled with images of her.

Images of his manhood in her hands.

Her pink lips breathing heavily and bruised from his kisses.

His hand on her thigh with her legs wrapped around him.

She smiled.

He snapped.

* * *

She stood there willing him to kiss her, willing him to think of her as more than a mage, more than a wild child. She wasn't sure what she wanted more; to hear him say she disgusted him or that…and then she sensed something in him. Although he didn't say a word, she could feel his hunger, like the rabid dogs or darkspawn before a fight, and the fine hairs on her body stood up.

His hand grabbed her wrist and she was being pulled somewhere. She was trying to balance but almost fell as she was pulled into the castle. She was drug through the halls of the castle and she didn't fight because she had wanted a reaction. Now she had one. Then he grabbed both wrists and pushed her onto…onto a bed! She could smell him on the sheets and blankets, everywhere.

She heard his armor and clothing fall, but then he was just standing there across from her breathing hard. He hadn't moved for what seemed an eternity.

She sank on her knees and ran a single finger down the inside of his thigh. He shuddered beneath her finger and she bit her lip. She felt more powerful than the queens of stories and tales. She felt more excitement than when her daggers soared through the air during battle.

His hand snaked into her hair and pulled her towards him and she laid her lips against his belly. He hissed through his clenched teeth as she rolled her tongue down his stomach. She untied the leather holding his underclothes and then he stood naked before her. She took him in her mouth and he let out a groan which made little fairies dance around in her belly. She loved how he shook under her touch. Loved him. His hands clenched and pulled at her hair which only drove her to move her mouth faster. He was gasping now and though she couldn't see him, she could feel his skin heating.

"Maker, Mina, you have to stop!" Each word came out a pant and she felt herself being lifted and deposited down on his bed. This time it was a tongue on her stomach and her back arched. His tongue was at the top of her leather skirt and then he kissed her _there_ and she could feel the heat of his mouth through the leather. She cried out in pleasure as his tongue followed the curve of the leather seams. She nearly hit him in the face with her hips as she raised them to get the skirt off.

He chuckled and helped her pull the skirt down. When her skirt was off he resumed kissing her stomach.

"Take off the top, Mina" His voice had changed, husky and thick, and Mina was intrigued by the sound in it, but she acquiesced, her top thrown at something and landing with a thud.

"Maker, you're beautiful. If only you knew how many times I dreamed of doing this to you" And he kissed her nipple. His mouth circled and kissed her breasts and nipples in turn. His hands moved along her thigh and then on the inside.

Mina heard distant mewling and realized it was her own voice. She felt something begin in her belly, but the sensation was new and she couldn't define it. Then it grew and grew. Her mewls turned to pants and she reached for something but it wasn't there, almost, but not yet. It was building inside her like when she was the sparrow and was flying up, up, up and she was just waiting until the exact moment to spread her wings and soar.

Up, up, up she went higher and higher. And his mouth, oh his mouth, _**there**_. And his tongue, 'yes, yes, yes', she thought, but she was screaming it aloud, not thinking it…"yes, yes, yes" and her hands were digging into the blankets. And then there it was and she cried out as her body soared and bucked against his mouth. And just as she felt the world closing down and her body was reduced to tremors and shakes, he grabbed her hips and plunged inside her.

The pain was brief, but hot and she cried out again, but even the pain was wonderful. He filled her completely. She had never felt like this, not like this, they were two, but one, and it was incredible and amazing and wonderful. He pulled her up and drove in deeper and she wrapped her arms and legs around him as he kissed her neck and whispered in her ear.

"You feel so good, Mina; like you were made for me." And she was, she was, she was made for him and no one else and for no other reason. Her hands moved down his back, tracing the muscle and scars that riddled it. She bit his shoulder and scratched down his back as the pleasure waves moved over her again and then it was up, up, up and she couldn't get much higher but then she could because it seemed she could fly to the stars at this moment.

He was moving faster within her and she was moving as well, with him. As one, but two, she thought again. She heard herself panting and he was in her ear with his hot breath which only made her go impossibly higher. And then she felt herself clench around him because she couldn't go any higher and then she was falling and falling and she didn't want to spread her wings at all, just spiral downwards forever, like this.

And he was with her, falling and falling and she felt his seed push into her as he called her name in a loud cry. And then they were floating, floating down, down, down and her heart slowed until she thought it might stop.

He laid her gently on the bed and then lay beside her his arm encircling her waist. And as he kissed her neck she was smiling, and then she was laughing and then she was floating, floating and floating into sleep.


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25 – The Dawn with No Sun

The highest point in the Tower was often encased in low hanging clouds. Because it was the highest point, the earliest mornings drew Mina to its peak. Sometimes she would spread her arms and jump, the feel of the wind in her hair and on her face stirring the only smile for the day. Sometimes she lay flat against the stone, her face turned towards the west, inhaling deeply. Most days she stood fully clothed at the peak, her clothes soaked with the mists of the lake and clouds. And often, on those days, Mina would walk through the halls, dazed, taking deep breaths into the collar of her robes.

The rumors had begun long before she came back. The rumors and discussions continued night after night after she returned. The Templars argued she was possessed, Wynne argued it wasn't possible.

"She cannot help with the Fade, now that you understand how she knows what she knows!" The Knight Commander bit out. 'And is what she is,' was his implied tone.

"And because so many of those have been compassionate enough to spare your men, especially when threatened?" Point one for Wynne.

"Just because they were spared before does not mean there isn't some plot behind it. Please recall Connor keeping Isolde and Teagan alive!" Point for the Knight Commander.

And so it went night after night with tensions rising between the two factions, until the halls grew hushed and the stress was so acute some feared the walls would crack open. The pressure was a living thing between the Knight Commander and Wynne. It filled every room they entered. It beat heavy and thick like an Ogre's heart, pounding against the walls. Soon the mages and Templars were possessed by the disquiet as well, and the Tower threatened to crack against the strain.

Mina was oblivious to the hush that followed in her wake. She walked dazed, sometimes smiling, as she came from the tower peaks and held a small piece of her robes to her nose. Other times she simply hummed (although it was more of a lament), looking sad and lost.

The Tower was nearly incited to a war that had been avoided for centuries, and the cause seemed completely unaware.

She entered Wynne's office without even a questioning look to the two that looked at each other with rage.

To everyone's shock she reached out and hugged the Knight Commander and patted his head.


End file.
